Building Self Confidence

*Gifted

I think self-confidence isn't one of those things you can have and keep, it needs to be maintained, constantly worked on and always aiming for better. 

Personally, for a long time, - I struggled with self-confidence. I still do. But it is something I am aware of now, and something I constantly question myself over. Should the way I look to others matter? Or should it be how I feel about myself on the inside? Is there a happy medium? As much as we would all like to be able to say our appearance plays no part in our self-confidence I don't think very many of us can relate to that - and I don't think its true. 

I know over the past 10 years as an adult there have been moments where I have felt like my appearance was all that mattered - a very bad place to be indeed. I have spent hours crying over various aspects of my body, as if who I am inside means next to nothing. 

Because of those moments, I have actively tried to focus on who I am, what I am achieving, the aspects of my personality that make me likeable - the bits that make me, me. More than my weight, my hair, my makeup, my clothes. I pushed myself to consider more than just how I look. After all, I don't look for other peoples appearances when getting to know someone properly, I think about their personalities more than anything - so why wouldn't I give myself the same credit? 

I don't look for other peoples appearances when getting to know someone properly, I think about their personalities more than anything - so why wouldn't I give myself the same credit? 

I have started to notice which things draw me to people, and apply the same basis on myself too. Their smile might be infectious - it typically means they have an infectious personality too, overspilling with enthusiasm and sheer joy. It could be their outfits, their love of fashion or quirky t-shirts - but that will come hand in hand with their love of how they portray themselves. Or it could be Tattoos, displaying their interests in a visual, creative way, ensuring you are curious about the stories behind them. The best qualities of people are never what they wear or how they look - its how they act, their passions, their kindness, their humour and their enthusiasm. 

So I am beginning to see my appearance as more of a booster now, or an extension of who I am, a conversation starting point - not something that defines me. If I am feeling happy and confident with a big smile on my face, spent time on myself doing my hair, my makeup - I know I feel good on the inside too. My confidence will radiate, and I know I become more approachable. My smile will make others smile, my enthusiasm shines. 

So I am beginning to see my appearance as more of a booster now, or an extension of who I am, a conversation starting point - not something that defines me. 

This is why I love going to Fin & Co. to get my hair done. They appreciate that hair isn't everything - but it can make a big difference to how you feel on the inside too. They want you to leave with a smile on your face, feeling your best. They focus on enjoying the whole experience, ensuring you are comfortable, in complete control, and are getting everything you wanted. 

They consider your life and how your hair can be beautiful, yet practical too. They consider how much time you want to spend on your hair, whether you wash, dry and straighten your hair daily, or hate doing anything to it at all. They also factor in how you care for your hair, how often you come back for a refresh, how much fuss you want to make of it. Most importantly, they consider if you will be able to keep your hair in the same way they have styled it. It's pointless getting your hair cut for curls when you can't/won't do them for yourself. Taking some extra time to get to know you and figure out what you want will ensure you always leave with a big smile on your face. 

I love my hair being pretty, I love it being less grey. I love it being quick and easy to manage, but at the same time looking like it isn't. Hence my blunt dark cut. Which seems to somehow look good while maintaining 6-year-old me vibes. I also will not curl it - I SUCK at curls, and my hair is super thick - so I can never get it looking good, so I don't. My undercut ensures the weight sits evenly, and Fin & Co suggested Kebelo the last time which massively reduces my drying and straightening time. Overall, my hair is perfect to manage for me and my lifestyle, looks good and makes me feel super confident about myself. 

Then because I had a night out that night we also popped a pleat in with some glitter. HOW COOL. Seriously my inner child LOVED it. Who doesn't want glitter in their hair? I then spent the night getting to know people at a party, talking about my blog, Instagram, midwifery, births, placements - and of course, the glitter in my hair, what an awesome conversation starter. 

You can find Fin&Co here, and on IG here, or at:

1A High Street,

Carnoustie, 

Angus

DD7 6AN

Tel: 01241 852321

If you haven't watched my story on my visit to Fin & Co it is on my Instagram under highlights!

 Overall I am loving my hair more than I ever have, and that is all thanks to the team at Fin & Co, they are an absolute joy to go to, and if you are local, I would highly recommend checking them out and booking in if you haven't already.

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