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"I'm on a diet"







There is nothing I hate more than being on a diet.


I love food, those who utter "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels" clearly haven't had Ben & Jerry's... or a dominos pizza. Don't get me wrong, I really dislike the feeling of being bigger than a size 12, but damn I earn every pound I gain in sheer joy from eating it.

I am the polar opposite from a secret eater, I gain weight and I can tell you exactly where all the pounds came from, but when the time comes.. I need to loose it all again.

The absolute worst thing about being on a diet is accepting that you are unhappy. Because the minute you accept and begin to deal with it, those flabby handles you have been ignoring for a few weeks/months now feel like you are a whale lumping around a spare tyre, all you want to wear is a bin bag... and pyjama bottoms in 5 sizes too big to make yourself feel better.

Just to add more insult, the dreaded questions from friends, co workers. "would you like a cake" Fuck yes. but keep that shit away from me. Explaining to anyone you are on a diet is the equivilent of saying "I THINK IM FAT" then the looks or either "oh good" or shock. to follow with "oh no you dont need to diet, you look fine" Damn bitch I dont want to look fine I want to look spectacular, now go away and let me eat my carrot sticks in peace.

The constant checking of food... remember when you used to be able to eat without checking the calorie or protien content? life is hard on a diet, so the next time you see someone on one, ask them about it, act like you are super interested in how to make syn free lollies, or what a healthy extra is.


Love, 

A new dieter :) 

2 comments

  1. I absolutely HATE dieting, I just love eating what I want when I want. I have quite a fast metabolism so I'm quite lucky, but I've been trying to do a half hour youtube workout everyday - I think as long as you do enough exercise you can eat what you want and not put on weight!

    The Velvet Black | UK Style & Beauty Blog

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  2. aaah you are so lucky! I swear I look at cake and gain a 1lb!

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